News of the Week, So Far

The Department of Defense has been ordered to fight seafood fraud. All this while Baghdad is under threat.

AMA declares gender is “imaginary.”

The dog ate my homework. Translation: All those emails you wanted, Congress? Well, my hard drive crashed and I specifically lost all of those, and now the computer has been thrown away too.

Redskins, your name is hurtful to those of us who are sensitive. I (the government) am taking your property away.

Er.Um. I got that Benghazi ringleader you all were worried about….finally.

Our Secretary of State: I wonder if Iraq is aware of how bad global warming is….

Hopechangeistan.

Gobbletygook.

The world is going mad.

And the beat goes on. La-di-da-di-di.

We better say our prayers.

Advertisements